Showing posts with label karaoke. Show all posts
Showing posts with label karaoke. Show all posts

Monday, December 31, 2007

2007: A Year in Review

During a conversation with one of the bankers on my team, I heard about a traditional Jewish holiday in which the individual spends the day praying. It wasn't anything ground breaking, most religions have some type of holiday devoted to inner reflection and asking for help from a higher power, but I remember this conversation because of a belief he mentioned. The day's purpose was to prove worthiness and the activities of that day would supposedly determine how the next year went for the person. I am sorry that I don't remember more details of which holiday, but I pay attention to the holidays of other religions as much as I pay to the holidays of the religion I was raised on. After describing the day, he mentioned that he isn't sure if he believes that the day actually determines how his year goes, or if it is psychological, meaning he chooses to see the year as positive or negative overall. It is similar to an optimist or pessimist looking at the same scenario and determining how full the glass is.

In reflecting on 2007, I cannot determine if this was a good year or a bad year. If I read this site as of late, I'd say it was a terrible year. But my natural instinct is to review the entire year as a good one. That could just be the optimist in me (I've been accused of always seeing the bright side), but I am starting to understand that in whole, the year wasn't that bad. In fact, there were some awesome moments to hold onto and cherish.

Before I jump too much into my "Year in Review," I do have to mention one of the coolest things I've ever heard. Coca~Cola, my lifelong addiction, understands the draw of its consumers to need it's product at all times. So, to help Jews get their fix during Passover, there is a version of Coca~Cola released that is made from pure cane sugar and not high fructose corn syrup. I guess there are varying levels of kosher and during Passover, HFCS does not pass. Which means, besides the cocaine, it is the closest version of the original Coca~Cola made. I am going to find some of this during Passover because I have to try it!

A semi-tradition, DM and I started 2007 together at Perkins, playing a game we have deemed, "Ask the iPod." It is a silly game, but it entertains us. The game consists of my iPod, filled with 3,000+ song titles, and whatever silly question we can ask about the future. We have turned my portable music collection into a Magic 8 Ball or fortune teller. The funny part is the meanings we make up when the iPod gives an answer such as, "Drift Away," for the question, "What will happen in August of next year?" Knowing us, it would create an image of a Tom Sawyer/Huck Finn raft slowly floating down the Mighty Mississippi and we'd imagine that the song title implies we'll end up in New Orleans by December.

I say it is a silly game because the "predictions" have yet to come true. The iPod is a wonderful device, but fortune teller it is not. Yet, we still laugh, and in the hopes of gaining blogging material, we write down all the responses. We'll spend two hours doing this, until the battery is completely drained and the shuffle feature no longer produces funny answers. But it helps us start the year with laughter and friends. As for starting 2008, I have no idea if the iPod will be used to make predictions. Instead, I know I will be at James's house, celebrating the calendar change with friends and semi-strangers. DM may be there, I hope she is, but that depends on how she feels. I hope that she is feeling good enough to go out for a night, because tonight will be a fun night, a special night. And it is always better to ring in the new year with great friends.

With that said, I would like to review 2007, exploring the events of the year to see how I've changed, where I've grown, and what I've experienced. The year started with strong feelings of love. In January, I was still on top of the world, excited by correspondence with Andriy, that one that got away so many years before. I recognize now how futile those hopes are, but what can one do? When you love someone, it is hard to ignore how happy you can be with a simple hello, a brief message of kindness. It is a recurring pattern in my life, that at this point I can say with plausible deniablity, that wouldn't recur if I opened an email to find a note from him. I should know better, but it doesn't help. When the year started, I had received a recent note from him, which throws all the doors to memories open in my mind. There is a saying, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder." Absence views memories with rose-colored glasses, ignoring the not-so-perfect parts. I'm not saying that Andriy's visit, back in 1998, was filled with not-so-perfect parts, but that when I hear from him, my heart does grow fonder, longing for him in my life. I still love him, I always will in some way, but absence makes the pain dull. Without correspondence, I can gently shut the doors to memories, leaving them stored for the next time I need to remember. The hardest door to shut is always the one to the memory of his departure. I always remember being at the airport, wearing sunglasses inside because my eyes kept tearing up. The image of him, waiting for the last possible moment to board the plane, standing there, freshly shaven, leaning over and taking my face in his hands, moving his thumb over my jaw line as he gently kissed my cheek, saying goodbye, and boarding the plane, walking down the hallway to the plane, getting to the L in the walkway and turning back, for one last look, and waving with a sad smile and tears in his eyes, just about kills me every time. I don't know how I didn't fall to the ground, screaming, but somehow I managed to make it to the window and watched as his plane taxied to the runway. Silent tears flowing down my cheeks, understanding, but not wanting to believe, that this would most likely be the last time I ever saw him. In January, that is the memory that kept coming back, almost as a regret that I didn't do more to keep him nearby. As the days passed and no new correspondence arrived, I was able to shut some doors back up, but that final one stays open, just a crack.

At the end of January, my workload changed significantly. This helped keep my mind off of Andriy, and helped me enter February with a new purpose. A new program was going to be tried, and I spent the end of January, all of February, and the beginning of March training a new employee on an individual basis. This took me away from my team 20 hours a week, which was hard, but also helped by providing one of the best employees I've ever had. The effort involved was completely worth it and I'm thrilled with this employee. She is truly great, in all areas, for the team. Besides wonderful performance, she is an integral part of our team, driving others to greatness, always recognizing her peers, and promoting a team work atmosphere in a job that can easily be seen as individualistic. While it was time-consuming at the beginning, it has had an amazing payoff.

Also in February, I had concerns with family life. My mom had a hip-replacement surgery in February caused by severe arthritis in her right hip. There was worry during the surgery, relief after she made it through the operation, and then visiting her in the nursing home that she spent a week after the surgery. For Mom, this was the low point of her year. It was hard to see her in the nursing home, recovering. She was able to return home after a week, and spent the next six weeks at home, mostly in bed. I would visit on Mondays and we'd play Trivial Pursuit and watching television. The good thing is that the replacement surgery went well, she is up and walking around now, able to do more activities than before the surgery and without pain. It also started me going to her house every Monday, which allows me a wonderfully home cooked meal, time spent with the pets, and being able to connect with my mom. Our relationship is stronger than it ever has been and I'm grateful of the time I get to spend with her. It is absolutely wonderful.

In March, I kept going to my dad's on Sundays, my mom's on Mondays, and karaoke was still the activity of the week. DM turned 40 this past March, which was celebrated by going to the opera, eating a meal at Manny's, and having her mother visit. We had a great weekend of scrapbooking, pictures were taken, and we were able to enjoy a typical Sunday night at karaoke. Well, typical in the fact that we were at the Chalet, singing and laughing. But there were some extra special moments of birthday celebration for DM, including presents.

April and May were both fairly uneventful. Patterns of my week were set, and I spent a lot of my time dealing with a couple of employees that made trips to HR's office frequent. The good news is that I'm not dealing with that anymore, but it was stressful. To de-stress, a manager's meeting was called at Manny's by Liz. Adding James into the mix, the three of us went to have a good meal and talk manager talk. It is helpful to have friends who are managers in different fields because we can swap stories and tactics. It just works well.

In June, I did something I've never done before. Since DM ditched me this past year for vacation to go to Wisconsin with Keem, I decided to take a trip by myself. It was a simple trip, exploring Minnesota. I spent a lot of time in my car alone, driving and thinking about life. I also went on my first tour of a cave, saw the headwaters of the Mississippi River, and almost died in a hail storm on Lake Itasca. Okay, I didn't even get hurt, but being surrounded by noisy, irritating children, having the boat pummelled by grape-sized hail, and accepting a ride in a stranger's car were all life-or-death situations. But it all turned out well. Plus, I got to play with my new camera and loved the results.

July was uneventful, mostly dealing with work and going to karaoke. If I had realized at the beginning of July that our Sunday karaoke days were coming to an end, I might have appreciated them more. But with weird Scottish Craig trying to sit on top of me each week, I guess the memories are tainted. Now that karaoke doesn't happen on Sundays, the nights are filled with occasional scrapbooking, occasional going out with Liz and James, or sometimes a meal at Perkins. But even the nights at Perkins are infrequent on Sundays, for fear of running into Craig or his friend, another oddity called John. July did also allow another trip to Manny's to celebrate Liz's birthday. I do look forward to our different birthdays!

August brought a trip to Waupun, Wisconsin with DM. It was the second year we've made this trip, visiting with my mom, Scott, my aunt Cheryl, my uncle Tim, my cousin Ellen, my cousin Brad, and Brad's girlfriend Jackie. We had a great time, laughing with my family, sitting around a campfire, and playing games. It is a nice time and hopefully we'll get to do it again this year. It is just a weekend, but a fun weekend.

September was probably the best month of the year, and also the worst. On the work front, it noted the start of a difficult time. That difficult time is a large reason why my writing is so infrequent. There is a bit of fear in posting any details of the time and so, being wiser, I have not written anything. All I can say now is that the issue has minimized and I don't have to worry about it anymore. Which is good, because it was a bad time. But on a positive note, September was awesome. I went on a road trip with my mom. I was able to see places I've never seen before, and I was able to spend a wonderful week with my mom. I've written loads about that trip here, posting picture after picture. It was a week I'll never forget and we are already talking about our next trip. My mom said, at Christmas, "This has been quite the year. I spent the beginning of it in a nursing home and I was able to go drinking on Beale Street." We explored St. Louis, both of us mustering up enough courage to enter the Arch. Big, scary bridges were crossed back and forth across the Mississippi River, and we both cried at the Bill Clinton Presidential Library. We have a shared story of the Sizemores, a couple we met while driving through the Ozark Mountains. We've both been to Graceland now and the memories are wonderful.

In September, I also went to my 10-year high school reunion. Besides the fact that I got to see Liese and Bruce, and the fact that James was kind enough to accompany me, I know I won't go to another reunion. Class reunions are interesting things - forcing people to talk with one another when besides the diploma, most have little to share in experiences. I'm not saying high school was a bad time for me, quite the opposite in fact, but I don't feel a need to relive it with a bunch of strangers. Oh well. It was just one night.

In October, I took another week off of work. During that week, I relaxed at home, went to Manny's with my mom, Scott, DM, and Liz to celebrate my 29th birthday, and DM came over for the weekend to scrapbook. It was a pleasant week, filled with friends and family. It has become my tradition to take a week off of work in October each year. I had hoped for a trip to South Dakota for the first part of that week, but with DM's diabetes claiming most of her vacation time in 2007, that has been postponed. It was still a wonderful week and the shining point of the month. Work was stressful and great, filled with ups and downs that I'll not visit here.

In November, I had a few scrapping weekends with DM, a visit to my grandparents house for Thanksgiving, and another Thanksgiving meal at Dad's. The second meal involved a garlic injected turkey (oh, yum!), my mom, my dad, Scott, and DM. After the meal, we sat at the table, sharing stories and laughing. There was happiness in the room and I found myself thankful for having parents that still get along even though the marriage didn't last. It is great to see my mom so happy with Scott and knowing that my dad is happy in his life.

December, as always, was a busy month. End of the year work was required for my job, including writing reviews, planning for 2008, and spending the last of the budget. Work got fun in December, with the problem from the previous months being moved away. In an attempt to use up more of my vacation time (I get six weeks a year and can carry over up to one week, so I had seven weeks of vacation time to take. I managed six and will carry over another week for 2008), I took yet another week off. During that week, I went to my mom's house three times to bake cookies and watch movies. I also did a little shopping, slept late, and managed to plan about 4 hours of activity every night. My mom, Scott, my dad, DM, and I all went to Benihana's one evening for dinner, which was good once we got past the fact the restaurant was freezing.

As the holiday approached, I did some last minute shopping. On Christmas Eve, I went to Mom's house again, this time to watch two holiday movies and stay up until midnight, talking with her. On Tuesday, Christmas Day, I headed back over to her place around 5 pm. Dad joined us and we ate a wonderful meal of Swedish pancakes (which are to die for). We opened gifts, everyone receiving something they loved. I got a new lens for my camera, which I can't wait to try out on vacation. My mom received her gifts, but reacted in a way I wasn't expecting to the book I made for her. She opened the package, finding the book, "Bridges of the Mississippi River," and noted that the person who went had that same light burnt out on the Memphis bridge as when we were there. Then she realized that it was a book that I had made and cried uncontrollably for 20 minutes! She loves the book and has looked through it over and over. I wasn't expecting that strong of a reaction, but it ended up pretty good. After presents, we all spoke for awhile, and then Dad went home. I stayed a little longer, playing a game with Mom and just talking. While I can't remember a Christmas that was bad, this was a wonderful day and I'm trying to remember it for always.

Seven hours to go and the new year will be upon us in the Central Time Zone. I've got to get to Mom's now for a Monday night dinner and then pick up DM (hopefully) for a party at James's house. My New Year's Resolution is to not let work bog me down and devote some more time to the blogosphere. I know I have over 200 posts to read, according to bloglines, and I plan on being around this week to read and to comment. Best wishes for a Happy New Year and I look forward to all the great stories of 2008. I guess 2007 was a pretty great year and I hope that 2008 brings more fun, laughter, and experiences to all.

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Remember Me?

May is half over and this is my first post. What is happening? Ugh.

Sorry for being M.I.A. Nothing too exciting has been happening and there is really no reason for my absence. School is over - I did end up with an A even though my group members didn't deserve the massive amount of work I did on our projects. Someday I'll find a group where everyone contributes equally and can actually produce a good piece of work. I don't really want to rant about this anymore. I'll leave it at the fact my teacher said he'd change others grades if he saw fit and our final project received 100% for me. I'm hoping the other members didn't get that. Especially since it wasn't a 100% deserving paper.

In family life, all is good. Mom's walking around and back at work. I think she likes being out of the house again. Grandpa is getting stronger and instead of talking about hospice, he now is practicing walking back and forth across the living room and practicing getting in and out of the car. Dad likes this. I do too.

Work is, well, work. That might be part of the reason I've been missing. My stress level fluctuates at work quite a bit. I need a vacation and I have one approaching quickly. I decided to take the first full week of June off and if I can actually get someone to cover the Friday and Saturday night, I might get to. My team is on the path back to #1, but we're struggling in a couple of areas. There's just a lot of work to do each day. This is good because it keeps me busy, but the days of being able to sit back and watch all the efforts pay off are a ways away.

We had an off-site meeting last week. Actually, all the supervisors/managers went to a Twins baseball game. I took a few pictures that I liked.

I liked this one because you can see the ball.
06 Bullpin

This is outside the stadium.
Downtown Mpls

This one was cool because the guy leading the wave (one of my peers) is the only object in focus.
10 Paul Leads the Wave (3)

In the office, I've been dealing with a leave of absence, two terminations, and numerous warnings. And that's only 1/4 of the team. The other 3/4 are performing great. That's where the struggle lies. We actually have a great team, but there are a couple of people who end up taking up all my time. It gets stressful. I still love what I do and I love my team. This is just normal frustration.

In response to a few comments from the last post. I know I wrote it a few weeks ago. Some readers feel sorry for the girl I went to high school with and I guess I can't blame you. What I left out was a time I was at Perkins with my former roommate. She was there with a flamboyant guy (to which I have no problems. I was there with a flamboyant guy myself.) As they were leaving, another table made a comment about her behind. Her friend came over and accused me of making fun of her. If she was so willing to blame me for a rude remark, I have no sympathy for her now. She knows we were never friends. I never did anything to her and I just want nothing to do with her now. And each time I run into her, she hugs me. I don't understand the leap between 'we were never friends' to 'buddy-buddy.' She's living in a different reality than I.

I recently purchased an upgraded version of Photoshop Elements. One of the things I've been doing with it is creating scrapbook layouts/plans. It's a way to 'not think.' Below is an example of what I've been doing. I have over 30 of them in the computer and at least 15 more drawn out on paper. Makes me think I really should develop pictures soon so I can scrapbook them.

SCRAPBOOK LAYOUT 5

Karaoke has been enjoyable. DM is back and that is nice. I missed her. It has also been nice that Craig is in another country. The Sunday that DM was gone was an interesting one. Amy, Sara, and Shannon were there. Char showed up later too. There were also prostitutes that were thrown out the bar for soliciting this table of Eastern European men. It's a neighborhood bar in a varied neighborhood. Some of the adventures we've had from karaoke make the bar sound like this terrible place, but it really isn't. Just weird, random things occasionally happen there.

I keep thinking about my vacation. I have some tentative plans for the time off. I'm going to be house sitting for my mom while she and Scott go camping the weekend before the time off. I figure I can plan a few day trips around Minnesota for photographic opportunities (and play with my newest toy - a Sony digital SLR). I have three places in the state in mind and also found something cool to do in Minneapolis. The last weekend of the time off will be good for scrapbooking and hanging out with DM, Keem, and Sarah.

Again, my apologies for not being around. I know there are over 90 posts to read. This is what happens when you get behind. To think, I used to read and post daily. To get there again. It shall happen.

Oh, and I now know my final classes schedule. I have another class at the end of June, one in the late summer, and then three in 2008. My last day of school will be June 9, 2008. Just in time for my 11 year anniversary with the company that pays for my tuition.

Monday, April 09, 2007

For a Title, I'd Like to Quote Lyrics to a Song in the Easter Karaoke Fashion, But Tact Prevents Me

Solo tonight, I headed to the Chalet and arrived just as my watch signalled 9:30 PM. The infamous DM is MIA, claiming the sickness has won tonight. In telling Bryan, our minister and leader at this church of song, that she had to leave a wedding early on Saturday due to this illness, he is surprised by the notion. "I never remember that you can just leave." But then the thought of an "Uncle Joey" sampling an open (or cash) bar always keeps him present for the after festivities.

With this holiday (Easter) being an early morning event, the size of the crowd tonight will be a wild card. I hope the Angie Ang & Amy group shows up and it would be nice to visit with Jason & his crew. James is back in town so he should be up with Liz towards the end of the night. An absence of a certain phony Scottsman would be appreciated. Unlikey, but hey, a girl can wish.

Last year, we had an Easter karaoke worthy of our eternal destinations. Much enjoyment can be found in replacing each "baby" as "Jesus" in the songs. Some songs end up with a good Christian connotation; some do not.

Amy text messaged me to let me know she will not be up tonight. I hoped for Angie and Amy to be there, especially since Angie was part of the "celebration" last year and mentioned this upcoming Sunday last week, but no such luck.

There are two doors to enter the Chalet, one on each end of the bar leading from the parking lot. Both entrances are actually two doors. The entrance by the karaoke machine is close to airtight so when someone opens the outer door, the inner door moves slightly. This signal a new patron entering and is my secret to my "psychic" abilities. I am noticing that each time someone enters tonight, I am afraid it will be Craig and that I'll be stuckalone with him. This is not good. I do not like the feeling of worry I get over the fact I will most likely be stuck talking to him alone.

There is a post I have been postponing to write about this problem. File it under "unwanted advances." I suppose this post will be the one where I explain this problem. The issue is an overly friendly and obvious obnoxious man who is too closely intermingled in my circle of friends. I do not want to be rude tohim because he is a friend of a friend, but it comes down to the fact he creeps me out. He always tries to sit next to me, his mood turns sour when another man (interesting or not) sits by me, and feels the need to wear enough cologne to cause a medium sized community run for gas masks. His most recent attempt at flirting has been to introduce baby talk into his fake accent. "Gooseys" is not impressive. And there have been few in my life who have gotten away with their lives after calling me, "Bethy." My godmother is allowed that pet name; not him. It is a simple way to aggrevate me instantly. The metal baton and consistent 'I hate the bloody world' attitude he carries are also turn-offs. And forcing me to listen to an obscene song about a woman demanding oral sex is not going to make me want to go near you (or your Listerine infested crotch (side note: James and Dean shared a story about Craig's attempt at dating that involved washing himself in a certain area in the hopes of getting some action on a first date. This is also not a turn-on.)) Telling me that when "I take you out to dinner" (NEVER happening) that you'll bring me to a vegetarian establishment and we'll share tofu (I'm a carnivore ID-10-T) does not increase your chances.

I've been tempted to say to him, "Very few people are allowed in my bubble. You're not on the list and you never will be."

Bryan has not decided what our church is yet this year but has told me the disappearance of honey bees is the sign to prove we're right in our beliefs. It is good to be friends with such a creative and humorous man.

Andrew has arrived, receiving hoots and hollars of "I love you!" from the bar patrons (okay, mostly Donnie). Andrew is a fixture at the Chalet. He tends to follow Bryan around and they create mischief. They are the reason pick up baseball games are commonly held in the bar.

While trying to kil time on this slow Easter karaoke Sunday, I turn back in my notebook for random notes of unpublished posts. I bring you some of these now. Well, those that are Chalet related.

In January, I was practically mauled in the bathroom by a woman too highly hopped up on Woman's Lib. While I am an advocate for equality between the sexes, I ould choose another avenue to express this value. Yelling in pride at another woman that you don't know in a public restroom, "We just need a voice! We are women! We need toilet paper!!!" seems a bit extreme.

From sometime in February, I have this written in the notebook: Only at the Chalet can you observe an obnoxious, intoxicated woman screaming, "I need balls!" while trying to master the art of juggling, using her words and not mine, "weiners."

A conversation between DM and I while playing Trivial Pursuit in March:
B: What dictatorship was the only South American nation to support the British in its war over the Falkland Islands?
D: Iraq
B: What South American nation...
D: Oh! China?
B: [pause] [groan]
D: Chile?
B: Now you got it.

Ten thirty has arrived and Bryan has started a rotation. A guy just sang a great rendition of "The Lady is a Tramp," and now DM's fan is singing, "Love Me Tender." I lke the mood being established.

Okay, back to my notes. Speaking of fans of DM, a few weeks ago we met Tommy. Describing Tommy is important. Bryan allowd a cross between a pirate, Freddy Krueger, the Wicked Witch of the West, and David Bowie from the "China Girl" video. Aptly put.

DM was wearing her purple top that sparkles. It was a beacon for Tommy. He was inspired by her blouse to sing a song, or in better words, croon some Andy Williams while gazing at DM. He told her, while grabbing a seat next to her, "I love your shirt, your beautiful shirt. Did you make it?"

She replied in the negative and he continued. "Has anyone told you they like that shirt? Help me because I can't see [he was trying to read the karaoke book] - I love your beautiful shirt."

At the end of that evening, he stopped by the table again to compliment the shirt again. "I'm so absolutely in love with that blouse. I think it is the best ever." DM was ready to give him the shirt off her back just to satisfy him.

Two weeks ago, Bryan suggested a visit to plasticgrocerybag.com. Supposedly, this is a site that suggests fun activities to use those leftovers from shopping. And most of the ideads are terrible and involve young children. I keep meaning to check it out - Bryan mentioned it is good for one of those uncomfortable laughs.

Eleven PM is here now. So is Craig. His first words to me involved a story about a stripper and pasties. Great. During the rest of the evening, he mentioned bowel movements (in not so nice of terms) that resembled egg rolls and used more English slang than normal. I swear, Craig arrives and the stage direction should read, "Enter Uncomfortable Silence stage right."

Jason, Kenny, and Ryan did all appear after only 30 minutes of my torture with Craig. The bar filled up around midnight and karaoke was going strong. Around 1, Liz, James, and little Matt arrived. Liz and I had a great conversation about management frustrations (one of the reasons I love talking to Liz and James is the fact we're all managers in different fields so we can discuss the pros and cons without being industry specific).

I had a good time tonight, even with the creepy fake Scottsman (okay, he is from Scotland. But he has lived here for many, many years. His accent is only used on women) present. I'm happy to know that he will be out of the country for a few weeks starting in 9 days (yippie!!! Oh, sorry Europe) and the uncomfortable moments will subside for a bit. Everyone missed DM tonight and Easter Sunday was a little lower key than last year, but still a lot of fun.

Monday, January 22, 2007

Any Given Sunday

Written at karaoke, Sunday, January 21, 2007

There is a couple at the Chalet tonight I've never seen before but already I hope they return. They are mature adults, sitting close to the stage, and they are enhusiastic about karaoke. The woman is graying but not letting her youth slip away without a fight. Streaks of bright red peak out of her bob. The man reads a local paper as she sings, "Oh, What a Night!" in his direction. When she is done, he smiles and applauds before it is his turn to sing. The time comes when neither are on the stage but they sit holding hands, politley listening to each singer and encouraging other patrons. In thirty minutes and with no conversation between their table and ours, I know these are decent people.

Anthony, a regular who we both gave nary a second glance until he sang, has arrived with a group of twenty-somethings, giving proof that there is hope for the world that there are courteous and fun-loving youth out there that do not just exist to cause trouble.

It is a nice offset for the group in the corner. Amanda is there with two others, a woman who is sitting prim and proper with a man who is not the ROCK ON guy. Mary is also here at a table with some non-interested blonde. Mary is, well, almost annoying. She is nice enough, but aggressive. Alcohol does not help her demeanor. With the arrival of Amanda and Mary, it is even money on whether or not Stubes will show. And, as if on cue, the door opens and he is here. Amanda starts singing, Mary and Stubes start talking and instantly the bar is no longer quaint, but bursting with loud, obnoixious yelling. Where, oh where, can my Advil be?

I uncover my purse (hidden by my coat) to find the small bottle of headache relief and my eyes manage to spy another couple at the bar. The problem with being observant is the fact you see what you don't want to observe. This couple is a foot apart and their tongues are alreadying hanging out of their mouths like dogs on a hot summer day. As they lean in, they start French kissing, which in their case resembles tigers devouring a fresh kill. Class starts emulating from the building.

Anthony sings, DM and I both hope for, "Like a Stone," and he strays towards country. I never realized that "Two of a Kind," by Garth Brooks could be so hot.

Bryan calls up the next singer, reading the thoughts of most of the bar. "Oh, no! Stubes." He manages, "Honky-Tonk-Ba-Donka-I-Don't-Even-Care-If-This-Is-Close-To-Accurate-Titling-Of-This-Country-Equivalent-Of-Objectifying-Women-Based-On-The-Size-Of-Their-Ass," as always, with zero emotion. At least no women got up to shake their backsides in his direction this time. Thank God for small favors.

Oh my! What in the world is Ms. Prim-and-Proper not wearing? In a moment's notice costume change, she has transformed into a courtesan on leave from the bordello. While eye catching, the skin tight hot pink pants are not the scary bit of her outfit. It is coupled with a black corset. But she's got religion. The cross on the leather strap seems foreign with the outfit. We all get the sight of this ensemble as she joins Amanda on the stage for a rendition of some country song that the high notes feel like a saw scraping our spines.

The evening is moving along and we are surprised by James and Liz arriving. As they wave and get their beers, I make the decision to put away my notebook, ready for conversation rather than observation. Yes, just another night at the Chalet.

Monday, December 25, 2006

Happy Moments

As predicted, Christmas at my mom's was pleasant, fun, and to put it plainly, great. My dad and I both arrived a little after 4. Sitting in the family room, recently redone (quite the project for my mom and Scott), we watched the "Yule Log," on TV and conversed for a bit before opening gifts. The pets are getting older and all sat back, monitoring quietly.

I gave my mom a book, some cooking pans she wanted, coffee, and a movie she enjoyed. Scott received a CD and an iTunes gift card. I got my dad a DVD TV set and a golf store gift certificate. The gifts all matched the person and everyone enjoyd what they got. I received money from both parents, plus a care package (toilet paper and Kleenex), a bunch of miniture liquor bottles (I collect them like my father does - they are never opened and never drank), one of those memory foam pillows (yea!), and a digital picture frame complete with an extra memory card for my camera. There was the typical random gifts from mom, the things she picked up for me that she just decided to wrap. One year I got a jar of mayo. This year I got two cans of De-Icer for the car.

After presents, we talked some more. Then we headed upstairs for an excellent meal. The Swedish Pancakes, an old family recipe passed on since at least my great-grandmother, were perfect and I remember how much I love them. Once the meal was cleared, my dad hung around for a little bit and then went home. My mom and I ended up playing Trivial Pursuit, a game neither of us has ever really played before (except for Saturday night when I played it with Char). We were terrible at the game, but had a lot of fun. We both ended up laughing hysterically over a question about who was greeted in Japan by a robot dog singing the Russian national anthem. The answer was Vladimer Putin but my mom missed the fact it was the Russian national anthem and answered, "Walter Mondale!" Which was very wrong.

I took pictures, of course.

Pepper was Santa:
Santa Pepper

The new additions to my collection:
Mini Liquor Bottles

My dad with a bow on his head. He wouldn't let me take a picture of him when the bow was on his forehead.
Dad with Bow

On Thursday, DM, Sarah, and I went to karaoke. We haven't exchanged gifts with each other yet, but we did bring up the gifts for Bryan, Liz, and James.
Liz, James, and bryan:
LizJamesBryan (2)

Now I'm back home, relaxing before the next work week starts. I have a few reviews I need to get written this week plus a couple of interviews (which could turn into evening training again).

There was also something nice tonight when I got home. More on that tomorrow. I hope everyone had a lovely day, filled with love and happiness.

CarpeDM said: Glad you had a great time. I love the fact that your mom wraps up mayo and De-icer. She rocks. My standard answer for Trivial Pursuit political questions is James Van Buren. No clue why. Why does James always look a tiny bit psychotic? It must be part of his charm.

Diana said: Glad your Christmas was lovely. I get a giggle out of your mom wrapping up mayo.

Mother of Invention said: susdxqivTrivial Pursuit gets easier as you recognize answers from previous questions...or not! I think it's great that your mom and dad get together so you can see them both. Perhaps it was never awkward for them. Sounds like everyone enjoyed all the gifting you did. I can't wait to see your next post! I'm already guessing what it might be about! Won't let me comment as Mother of Invention!

Ellen said: Love how your dad is decked out in a tropical polo for Christmas day, lol. Brad and I went over to Jeff's and he made prime rib for Christmas. It was nice. I should get the pancake recipe from your mom some day. I know it takes a lot of work to make them, though. Hope you have an equally awesome New Year's Eve/Day!

Lioness said: I'm so happy you had a lovely Christmas, makes me feel all warm and fuzzy. I wish we could meet again.

Frustrated Writer said: I am glad you had a wonderful Christmas! I am glad I can post comments on your blog again!

Monday, December 18, 2006

Moderation is the Key

It is habit that makes me head to the Chalet on Sundays even when DM cannot make it. Liz had mentioned that she would arrive early if DM was still sick (which she is - Dana, go to the doctor. Get better now. You need to.) Well, it turned out tonight was the annual Christmas party for some group in Saint Paul (I think police?) and Bryan was hosting karaoke somewhere other than the Chalet. But! The good news? Angie Ang was hosting. So I went anyway.

When I arrived, a few of Angie's other friends invited me to their table and I sat with Tom, Josh, and Amy. Sara arrived shortly. Soon, we managed to adopt McKenzie.

It is unique to be the only sober person at a table. It's one thing when people have a tolerance and are not completely gone, but I was the only person without any liquor in my system. Sara was happy, Tom, Josh, and Amy were all enjoying themselves, and McKenzie started happy, went to blabbering, and then to sleepy. I felt a bit bad for her as she quickly went from having fun to sleeping at the table. Luckily, she had some good friends in the back of the bar who took her home and made sure she was safe.

There are a few pictures. Nothing much, but just an update. And maybe DM can feel like she was there a little?

Karaoke
Sara and Amy singing"Sweet Child 'O Mine". Tami and McKenzie dancing.

Karaoke (1)
Angie holding the dancers' beers

Karaoke (2)
Tom and Tami

Karaoke (4)
Sara singing (dancing) backup for Cory (a guy who was there with his uncle a few weeks ago)

The Chalet is closed next Sunday, but I'll be going on Thursday and hope DM feels better by then.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

I Promised Myself to Write 10 Things Tonight - So I Did

1. Last night, I went to go see "Stranger Than Fiction," and even with Will Ferrel in it, I liked it. Not side splitting laugher, but a cute movie with a fun plot and interesting turns of events. It was very much like reading a good book, but having the book read to you. I liked the narration, which drove the plot line. Emma Thompson was great, Dustin Hoffman brilliant as usual, and Will Ferrel was not annoying.

2. End of the year is coming and so we are forced to examine our budgets at work. After a little examination, Steve and I determined that we still had $250 to spend and since we have to spend it by the 10th, we went shopping. Normally we stock up on toys and food, but this trip to Target was one to get some prizes for contests (movies) and pick up some sort of holiday gift for the team. We ended up picking up winter mugs, tons of hot chocolate, tea, candy canes, about 10 types of chocolate, and some mint. Good winter presents. Once back at work, Steve and I put the gifts together.

3. To go with the mugs and to get ahead of the holiday frenzy, I got home from work and started making Christmas cards. I have 55 cards stamped and ready with pre-cut pieces. Now I just have to adhere all the pieces together. That's a project for another night. Too much bending over small pieces and I'm tired of it. But! I'm ahead of the holiday game. Sort of.

4. The other night I wrote about my mom's reaction to the pictures of Andriy. There was barely any reaction. Well, the next day (and today) she has been emailing me links and news she found online (she's into Google now - who knew?). The funny thing is she's not sending me anything I haven't found myself already ('cause being obsessive includes Google). But she managed to find the stories online about the previous men who held his job. I've been weary about posting the crazy stories I found about his job, but what the hey! So, here's the deal. It's not a safe job. Prestigious? Yes. Safe? No. There seems to be a history of men taking bribes and maybe one of those men was disliked and "riddled with bullets" on the front steps of his home because a group of people didn't want him to ever advance in politics. Yeah. This fact does not put me at ease. This is yet another reason why he should move to America.

5. When Andriy stayed at our home, we had another man visiting. He was older and, dare I say it, creepy. Not older as in elder, but just older than Andriy and I were. He was probably 32. Well, each time a group arrives through this program to the US, there is always a fear that the interns will defect. In this particular group, the leaders were actually thinking it would be Andriy they needed to worry about because of his political ties and if the election going on back home turned sour, it wouldn't be safe for him to return home. No one expected the guy learning about the Boy Scouts to defect. As we took Andriy to the hospital, he went to the airport but didn't return to Ukraine. Instead, he went to New Jersey and then disappeared. We figure he changed his name (we joke and call him Bob Smith). The really bad, sad part? He was married and left his wife and daughter in Ukraine. I'm sure he was sending them money, but the daughter was also very ill (Chernoybl effects). It was an odd turn of events. Not relevant, just something I remember.

6. I got an award today at work. It is for the performance of my team in 2nd quarter. It came with a $25 gift card. If I save up enough of these cards, I may treat myself. I know what I want, but that dollar amount seems to be too high for the time being.

7. It got really cold here. Yesterday wasn't too bad at 35 F, just above freezing. But drives home from work are at about 11 F (or less) and I wish it would warm up and snow. That's the problem here. We get really cold, but it gets so cold that the snow passes us by.

8. I have a new banker who joined my team at the beginning of the month. Nice guy - is performing pretty well too. I think he's going to fit in well in our team. But he did something I didn't expect yesterday. He left me a note (explaining something going on), but then signed it with "Love," drew a heart, and put XOXO under his name. It doesn't bother me, just seemed like an ending you'd use on a note to your boss.

9. Thursday night is karaoke night. Again. Finally. I've missed going on Thursdays. It will be nice to have that relief again.

10. Thursday will also be a hectic day for me. My team has two meetings tomorrow (our team is split into meetings because of the hours and instead of one meeting each month, Steve and I lead the same meeting twice in the same day). So I have a meeting from 3-5 and one from 7-9. Plus, I have a scheduled coaching session with my boss from 5-7. That's 6 straight hours of scheduled activities. Not entirely sure when I'll take lunch. Oh well. The meetings should be fairly easy. We want to celebrate a good year so Steve and I are planning on talking for about a 1/2 hour about performance and the results of some contests and then the team will watch a movie. That is if we can get a room with a DVD player. The evening meeting will be no problem, but the 3-5 one might be hard to find a room.

Monday, January 31, 2005

Mandatory Karaoke Update

"Hello.
Is anybody in there?
Just nod if you can hear me.
Is anyone home?

Come on, now.
I hear you're feeling down.
Well I can ease your pain,
Get you on your feet again.

Relax.
I just need some information first.
Just the basic facts:
Can you show me where it hurts?

There is no pain, you are receding.
A distant ship's smoke on the horizon.
You are only coming through in waves.
Your lips move but I can't hear what you're sayin'.
When I was a child I had a fever.
My hands felt just like two balloons.
Now I get that feeling once again.
I can't explain, you would not understand.
This is not how I am.
I have become comfortably numb.

Ok.
Just a little pinprick [ping].
There'll be no more -- aaaaaahhhhh!
But you may feel a little sick.

Can you stand up now?
I do believe it's working, good.
That'll keep you going for the show.
Come on it's time to go.

There is no pain, you are receding.
A distant ship's smoke on the horizon.
You are only coming through in waves.
Your lips move but I can't hear what you're sayin'.
When I was a child I caught a fleeting glimpse,
Out of the corner of my eye.
I turned to look but it was gone.
I cannot put my finger on it now.
The child is grown, the dream is gone.
I have become comfortably numb."

- Pink Floyd, "Comfortably Numb"

It was Sunday, yet again (can you imagine it happens once a week?), and so DM and I made our way to The Chalet for karaoke. There was something strange about tonight though. All day long I had a feeling that karaoke would be different tonight, somehow. When I awoke this morning, it was from a dream about karaoke. I do not dream often so vividly and clearly. Normally my dreams consist of things that happened previously to me, not of things that haven't happened [yet]. When the dreams do come through so vividly, I usually spend the entire day trying to figure them out. I'll get to the dream in a bit, but just know that it put me on my toes for the day.

The drunks came out early tonight. By the time we arrived, there was already a woman who hopefully ended up throwing up once she got home to get rid of all the alcohol in her system. You know that point right before alcohol poisoning? She was there. She seemed to be hitting on Bryan (the host), she kept touching him and he looked uncomfortable. When DM got up to sing, she screamed (volume control had been lost on her hours before), "She's gonna do her thang!" Then she turned to Bryan and repeated her message, yet a little louder and a lot more forward, "You let her do her thang!" I hope your image of her includes the head bopping side-to-side in defiance. Bryan is staring blankly at her, trying to figure out how by letting DM up on the stage, handing her a microphone, and entering her song in the computer he is restricting her from doing her "thang".

Once Bryan started to sing (which is bliss - wow, that man has a talent), she approached him and I got the impression she meant to dry-hump him where he stood. His response was quick and I saw a side of Bryan I've never quite seen before. He reminded me of my mother, in fact. Actually, anyone who has ever been scolded by their mother probably knows the look he gave her and the correct tone of voice. It was firm and there was no nonsense in his words. "No! You need to sit down right now."

The woman managed to pick up Bryan's glass of Coke and started drinking it. The extremely odd part was that she finished it and then replaced it with a full glass of Coke. Finally, she left. Another table of drunks replaced her, making sure they were loud, obnoxious, and generally the "life" of the "party".

It was "New Song Sunday" for us and we each tried some new music. Michael has a Pink Floyd karaoke CD and only recently have I begun to appreciate the music. I know that sounds strange, but remember I'm only 26. I was born in 1978, towards the end of the Pink Floyd era. Pink Floyd (PF) was my parents music, right? I have found as I age, I have started to love the music of the 70's more than I would have thought at age 15.

My previous experiences with the music of PF was from a night hanging out with my ex-boyfriend from high school (The Jerk). I remember showing up at his place and sitting around watching The Wall while he got stoned. I'll tell you, watching this movie while sober is an extremely odd experience, especially when you are naive and somewhat sheltered. It freaked out my logical brain.

Michael has sung "Hey You" before and I found that I like the music. I really do. Tonight, Michael sang both "Hey You" and "Brain Damage". "Comfortably Numb" was sung by someone and I'll get to that. I know, I know, enough with the "suspense" right?

In between "Hey You" and "Brain Damage", the door opened to The Chalet and I felt all the color drain from my face. Imagine me, the vampiress already, looking like I've been exsanguinated*. My stomach started flip-flopping, John Kerry-style, and I almost screamed. I did not, however, have the same reaction as the time I ran into The Jerk on campus**.

After a month hiatus, the boy and Pete strode into The Chalet. I guess there goes my theory of scaring him away completely. I didn't think that I was scary enough to chase a regular away from his weekly fix of beer and karaoke, but it had seemed to be the case. (If you don't know who The Boy and Pete are, please click this link and scroll down to the part labeled, "The Most Recent Disaster". I've documented it quite a bit actually.) Now, my dream should have prepared me for this. You would have thought the fact I had a dream that he walked in, started talking to me, and picking up where he seemed to have left off would have left me prepared. I had even joked about the dream with DM in the car on the way. I told her that he was at karaoke in the dream and he explained why he hasn't been there for a month and hasn't called. We laughed about it. It wouldn't actually happen, would it?

And yet...

I still look up each time the door opens, looking to see if it's him striding in. (He strides. He has a confident walk and I notice this.) I have done a good job of fooling myself that I am not still attracted to him after his not calling. I'm not sure if I fooled anyone but myself, and I even knew deep down inside, I still was curious about what happened. I don't see myself as uber-attractive, but I don't think I'm a Yeti or anything. I couldn't believe I was a monster scary enough to freak out the confident man.

So he walks in with Pete***. My eyes about bug out of my head and I figure they will hang out at the bar. Nope. Instead, they get a couple of bottles of beer and come over and join us. It's all smiles from The Boy and he keeps making sure to refer to me by name. He directs questions to me and we converse a little. He tells me that he was in another state for a bit of time over the holidays. He flirts with me. He acts like he was glad I gave him my number, but acts like the flirting is still going in a forward direction. He acts like I didn't screw up by bursting my bubble.

His first song of the night was, "You'll Accomp'ny Me". Which, I have to say, he sings fantastically. I still have problems listening to others try Bob Seger songs at karaoke. His second song was, "Comfortably Numb". He was excited to see that Michael had a PF disc and he asked to try the song. He had asked me to look for the song in Michael's CD case.

Here's the thing, it was his first time ever singing the song. It's a commonly known song. He normally does pretty good at his songs, but it was if this song was written and composed for him. He was f**king AWESOME at it.

I can't kid myself, I'm still attracted to him. I still want something to happen. I'm kind of confused, especially since he acts like there is no uncomfortableness. And the thing is, there really isn't anything all that uncomfortable, other than me being so confused.

His hair looked really strange. I don't know what he did to it, but it looked like an experiment. DM commented that maybe he had been wearing a hat earlier. I have noticed though I'm not usually attracted to a man's hair. Okay, I fell in love with a guy whose prominent hairstyles were a mohawk and that horrible bowl haircut so popular in the late 90's. The other guy I still care about had a mop-top. I'm not picky about hair, apparently.

When he was getting up to leave (after the last song of the night), he made it a point to make sure we were going to be there again the next Sunday. He looked me in the eyes as he asked. He smiled. I melted. Duh, right?

I feel like I've been side-swiped by a Mack truck. I thought this was over. I guess I was wrong. I don't know what is going on and I'm not overly anxious to get all girly again, but...

It was fun to flirt. It was fun to go a little (lot) crazy thinking about him. I still want to get to know him better. I'm weary and guarded, but I enjoyed the time he was there tonight. I just don't know what to think. I think I should become Comfortably Numb.

--

*To prove how much of an X-Files freak I am, I could not for the life of me figure out how to spell this word. I use the word, but I can't spell it. I remembered that it was used in one episode of The X-Files during season one and knew which scene it was. I put in the DVD, found the scene and watched it with the subtitles just to figure out how to spell it.

**A year after The Jerk and I stopped corresponding via telephone and pagers, I was walking out of my astronomy class. Another mass lecture class was exiting the building the same time as mine. Imagine my shock when I look to my right and I'm walking right next to the ex-boyfriend that I took a little too long to get over. My reaction? I screamed and ran back to the dorm. I didn't even know he went to the same school. I need preparation for these things.

***About half-way through the time of The Boy and Pete, I remembered that Pete's actual name is not Pete. DM also couldn't remember his real name. Michael didn't even blink when I called him Pete. Luckily, I did not actually call Pete by the fake name. That would have been slightly awkward. It was easy to not refer to him as Pete, since neither DM or I actually ever heard him say a single word. He has absolutely no personality.

3 Comments:

At 1:02 PM, Weary Hag thought...

Beth, I laughed myself silly at your footnote on the proper spelling of that five-dollar word! This confirms it. Like it or not you are a true perfectionist. I love it!
If I lived closer, I'd be stopping into the Chalet to join you and your friends from the sidelines ... sounds like you folks have a blast!
Glad you led me to your blog ... I'm having so much fun trying to keep up with you.

Carol

At 10:32 PM, CarpeDM thought...

Oh, you crack me up. I loved that you used X Files to find the spelling.

What a weird, weird night. From my being told to do my thang and being nuzzled in the neck by yet another drunk guy to the whole the boy thing.

What is going on with our world? It is askew!

Yeah, the boy was awesome singing comfortably numb. But what is with the hair?

At 11:33 AM, Firebear thought...

I love the line

"My eyes about bug out of my head and I figure they will hang out at the bar. "

it is very visual and funny when taken out of the paragraph. I just imagined the old cartoon eye popping wolf when he came in "Boing!" then they not bouncing back into the socket.

Monday, September 20, 2004

324-06 (Disc # - Track # for those not familiar with karaoke)

There are rules to karaoke and one that should be added is, 'If you're going to make fun of a song, have the guts enough to embarrass yourself by singing it.' Tonight seemed to be "Embarrass yourself Sunday" in honor of the previous "New Song Sunday".

The first song I sang tonight in the spirit of embarrassment was a song I hate. I mean this. It's a song where the singer whines the entire song. I sang, "Stay" by Lisa Loeb. Why? To make fun of it. That's the sole reason.

I was looking through the book, trying to find something new and fun, and I joked to Michael, "Should I sing _____?"

Michael's response, "Yeah! I'll sing it with you!"

I was not allowed to back out of this joke. My turn came around and Michael and I headed to the stage, ready to frighten the filling bar. Even Bryan was afraid of our choice.

Are you on the edge of your seat yet? What could possibly so odd for me to sing?

The answer:

Enter Sandman by Metallica.

That's right. I sang Metallica tonight. I didn't even realize I knew the song as well as I did. I guess this is what I get from years of being a pool hall junkie.

Surprise came to myself and Michael as we sang the song and realized it wasn't as terrible as we thought it would be. There may even be a repeat of the performance.

Dana came up with an interesting idea tonight while flipping through the book of songs. She'll be posting soon (be sure to check out: Green Duckies and Other Tales of Dana). I tried to help with this series of ideas and if popular, there may be many to come.

I did find a song in the book I didn't realize was there tonight. Mercy, Mercy Me by Marvin Gaye. I mentioned this to Bryan at the end of the night. He told me he's sang it before and he said he'd sing it in the future for me. I may just die of happiness. There are so many opportunities for growling in this song.

I need a moment.

Okay, moment's over.

We're planning on karaoke again next Sunday. It's just too much fun. There is always an open invitation to join us and we love big groups.

For those Tower junkies (and to annoy Dana), at this time it's less than 21 hours until I can hold the last book in my hands. In my obsession, I've been watching westerns.

From the Magnificent Seven.

"That's the best shot I've ever seen." As a man falls off his horse in the distance.

"Worst. I was aiming at the horse."

1 Comments:

At 5:36 PM, CarpeDM said...

Ah, the subtle differences between "Embarrass Yourself" Sunday and "New Song" Sunday. To the eyes of the untrained mortals, it may appear that they're exactly the same thing. But we know differently. We're in the know. We're cool.

I think there should be a "Going to the Wheel" Sunday. Followed by lots and lots of drinking. Which we don't do. I am striking the previous comment.

Monday, September 13, 2004

A quick update for Dana and Matt

I know this won't make much sense to the rest of the world, but I found it. I feel incredibly stupid and I'm thanking God that I found the ring.

I am so terribly sorry for the show I put on at karaoke tonight. I lost all grip I had to being sensible and I couldn't think. I'm sorry.

Thank you so much for looking with me. Thank you for tearing apart the sink in the bathroom to make sure the ring hadn't fallen into drain. Thank you for going through the garbage can with me. Thank you for looking around (the seats, the tables, the stage, the hallway). I feel really stupid about being so worried and I'm sorry I couldn't think straight.

I, completely unlike me too, decided to put gel in my hair to tame it down tonight. When I put the gel in my hands, I had removed the ring and put it on the bathroom counter at home. After I washed the excess off my hands, I forgot to put the ring back on.

Thank you both again for being supportive and helping me when I was an idiot. I'm sorry I was so distraught over an object. I hope you both know this ring means something to me that I can't write about at this time.

Again, I'm sorry for the show and creating worry. Thank you again for all you did. I know that drain was disgusting and I have two truly wonderful friends. Your support means the world to me.

2 Comments:

At 8:25 PM, Matt said...

I for one am not sorry for doing what I did, what else is a big brother for? We have all done things like that before, so do not fret anymore. You know that I would have torn apart a hundred sinks to look for you, because I know how much it means to you. Thank you for your gratitude of my friendship, that means the world to me. I will talk to you later.
Matt

At 8:51 PM, DeAnn said...

You're right. It doesn't make a lot of sense. But it's a lovely apology anyway!

Saturday, September 04, 2004


Just a close up of the same. Matt gives it his all. And he is "Whoo-worthy!"
Posted by Hello


With a little help from my friends... This is my big brother Matt. He sings Joe Cocker's, "With a Little Help From My Friends" at karaoke and he pours his heart and soul into the song. Anyone listening knows that Matt's bonds of friendship are strong. We're still waiting for the vein in his head to burst!
Posted by Hello

Monday, August 23, 2004

The new scent for men to drive women mad! Just not with desire.

It happened again. Dana wrote about the first experience, Beer Goggles - Parts 1 & 2. Scroll down on the link and you'll see what I'm talking about. I told myself the night of Beer Goggles that I would not wear a certain red t-shirt to karaoke ever again. Now I need to add a red sweater to that collection of non-public shirts.

The evening started off great. Dana and I pull up to the karaoke bar, ready for our soda and some great singers. A group of singers were there and we actually got to hear a duet of Picture that we didn't hate. Horrible song, pretty melody.

The group of great singers leave and it opens the door for a young man celebrating his birthday to get up and sing. There are great songs to sing at karaoke. Neil Diamond is a popular choice. Joe Cocker works well. Any country song tends to go over well in the bar we attend. Metallica does not fit in well. The young man decided to sing Sad But True by Metallica. It was not pretty. Here's a clue - the words are on the monitor.

Dana and I are karaoke junkies. If you get up and sing, we will clap. We may not yell, "Whoo-hoo!" if you torture our ears, but we do clap because the effort to sing is appreciated. He got the polite golf clap. It was short.

This was his clue to meander back to his seat and down a few more drinks. Once filled up with the nectar-not-of-the-gods, he beelined me. I feel I now understand what matadors feel as the bull runs towards the red flag. Unfortunately, I don't have a deadly weapon hidden in my bra.

Bryan was wonderful. As this man came up to our table, he called me up to sing. I tried a new song, not a good one by the way, and he stared at me singing. As much as I did not enjoy the song I was singing, it unfortunately came to an end and I had to return to my chair.

As I sit down across from Dana, he sits down next to me. "May I sit here?" he asks.

Here is my problem. I don't like being mean. He's drunk and never really did anything bad to me (except for the Metallica - which, don't get me wrong, I like Metallica. This seems like an odd choice of music for me, but I do enjoy the occasional Metallica song). The inherent part of my character comes out and I say, "Well, it's the last song of the night. I don't care." He sits.

Leaning forward, he breaths, "What's your story?" He doesn't talk. He's drunk and slurring words. I think he said, "What's your story?" It sounded as if he said, "Whaaaaaaaaaaa blah u-ba sor-ie?"

I look at Dana and the telepathic thought occurs. She understands my, "Oh God, not again. I hate red shirts. Maybe I'll wear a tarp next time."

"Everyone's got a story," he starts in again. "It might be short, like I went to the store, or it might be long. What's your story? How did you get here?"

Well buddy, I made it to karaoke by driving my car. I had two options, walk or use a mechanical vehicle to cover a distance of space. At this point, I'm still not responding.

He leans closer to me and exhales (he doesn't really speak. I'm pretty sure the ability to use one's vocal chords in normal fashion has left him), "So, what's your story?" (Or, Whaaaaaaaaaa ya sor-ie?)

I have to answer him. I say, "We came to karaoke. End of story."

Here's a clue. If you are talking to someone, hitting on them in a bar, you can tell if they are interested in the way they talk to you. If they answer your questions with simple, straightforward answers and do not extend the conversation by asking you questions, they are not interested.

"You have a good voice." (Or as I heard, "Ya haf go boyce.")

I reply, "Whatever." Does he get it with this? No, no he does not.

Michael, singing the last song, is now finishing up his rendition of Johnny Cash's Hurt. He is doing a wonderful job and I want to enjoy the song. It's a great song!

Interrupting the wonderful singing by Michael (a regular at karaoke and a super nice individual) is the drunk man next to me. "Who sings this?" (Whooooooooo ingzzzz diz?)

"Michael is singing it now. The version he is singing is Johnny Cash."

"Oh, he's good." (O, ez goo.)

Michael ends the song and Bryan says goodnight to the audience. He notices the horrible state of affairs at our table. Walking over to us, he starts speaking to Dana and myself. While we are eagerly conversing with Bryan, the drunk man feels ignored and finally wanders off. THANK YOU!

I explain to Bryan and Dana the interesting 'cologne' this gentleman used this evening. Maybe it's because he kept breathing on me or it might have been the fact he smelled like he took a bath in golden suds, I was not attracted to his overpowering stench of beer.

I may not be a beer drinker, however I understand that some people do desire the taste of a good bottle of suds. That's fine by me. As I stated, I'm not a beer drinker, but my sense of smell can differentiate from someone toasted on Guiness versus Bud Lite. I don't even have a problem with people drinking, in moderation. It is when the top brain stops working and bottom brain takes over, men start annoying me.

Driving Dana home, we noticed a billboard advertising the "Great Taste" of a brand of beer. Notice the sign pointed out the sense of taste, not the sense of smell. Beer breath is not attractive.

I learned something at karaoke this week. I learned being polite gets you nowhere when someone has lost the ability of complex thought. I learned red is not my color (or maybe it is - that could be the problem). I also learned how Dana and Bryan can be lifesavers. The red sweater is going into retirement.

2 Comments:

At 11:40 AM, CarpeDM said...

Next time, I'm wearing the low cut red shirt (which I don't own so apparently I need to go shopping). Let's see if my "girls" can get some attention. They are long overdue for some ogling.

I loved this post, Beth. When something like this happens, the only thought that really goes through your head is "Oh, God, please make him go away." It's after the fact that you can look back and laugh at the silly drunks.

Why are we so nice to them? It's not like they're going to remember it. And I think Bryan (and maybe even Bobby) will have our backs.

At 4:39 PM, Matt said...

Always rememebr the occasional Big Brother that will have your back as well, I will always be there for you, just call. I am sorry that I was not there, I would have liked to have seen what would have happened if I was.
Matt
P.S. Should I wear my low cut red shirt next time? I bet I might get some attention with my bongos.....