As defined by a piece of metal...

After a huge fiasco at the car dealership (maybe a post in its own right and written when I'm not still royally pissed off), my new car finally has license plates.

Like pretty jewels, the gleaming pieces of metal are now attached to the front and rear bumpers. The car is feeling special and frisky. And believe me, frisky is a good word to describe this machine once you read on.

In Minnesota, the plates consist of three letters and three numbers.* The letters may be first or the numbers may be. That doesn't really matter, but it is common for people to find words to fit their letters or phrases to identify the 17,576 possible combinations of letters. For example, Foxy had DBM as the letters. DM would refer to this as, "Dirty Blonde Men."

Adam's (my former roommate) car has CRP, which keeps being defined as "crap." His car is not crap, but it fits better than carp. Who thinks of fish first? His boyfriend's vehicle has JSM as the three letters. This also brings to mind a certain bodily substance. Yes, I know it's bad.

This brings me to my new car. I can't help but cringe each and every time I see the letters.

What letters are they? I'm so glad you asked, since I'm going to tell you. Read on if you want. Be warned, my first thought was not as clean as crap and I'm having a difficult time coming up with anything other than my first thought.

The letters are: NMP. My brain keeps adding a Y in between the N and M and adding a HO to the end. This is so untrue. I don't have that exciting of a life.

And I'll probably have these plates for the entire life of the car.

Yikes!

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* Unless you pay for personalized license plates, defining how much of a yuppie you truly are. Oops, that's just my personal opinion.

2 Comments:

At 6:24 PM, CarpeDM said...

Okay, when I get my El Camino, I am so having a personalized license plate. And I certainly don't consider myself a yuppy.

I am trying to think of a good way to think of your car now. It is not helping that you put your first thought in this post because now that is my first thought and I so wouldn't have gone there.

Nasty Male People? Naughty Minotaurs Playing? Nerds Mean Power? Considering what you told your cousin, he's either going to work for a nerd or be unemployed, this might actually work. I kind of like it. I am afraid I might start referring to your car as the Nerdmobile. Stop me now!

At 2:45 AM, brooksba said...

DM,

You best not be calling my car the Nerdmobile. No way. No.

I don't really like phrases though. I like quick words. I need something! Eke!

What would your plates say? Why would you need them to be personalized? It's your car anyway.

The only great personalized plate I can remember is the one for a Mercedes-Benz saying, "WAS HIS".